DIESEL MAY, Diesel Might, They Will Rock on Saturday Night

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Alberta Rock Outfit DIESEL MAY to Headline the Red Deer Air Guitar Championships

DM

As if you didn’t need more reasons to head over to Fratters this Saturday. Diesel May will be keeping the rocking large and in charge well into the night.

It’s going to be a crazy night of rock and riffing – all for the benefit of World Peace… Because as the ancient Air Guitar Mantra says – ‘When you are holding an Air Guitar, You can’t be holding a gun’. Air Guitar Canada is a not for profit that donates the proceeds of our events go to Right To Play Canada.

GET YOUR TICKETS: HERE

ENTER TO COMPETE: HERE

But back to Diesel May – Here’s the bio they have on-line – it’s epic and worth the read:

Do you remember when your youth prevailed, and like any young free spirit, you didn’t have a care in the world? Then one day your sitting in front of the store….swapping mix tapes with your buddies to see who had the best mix of Metallica, Anthrax, Iron Maiden, and even beauts like Slick Toxic…. when out of a cloud of smoke, like a dry ice overload at an Alice Cooper concert, a full sized GMC van roars into the store’s parking lot…. swinging trees hang from the rear view mirror by the dozens. You all look up from your Sony Walkmans to see who this fictional creature is….the looming sounds of King Diamond blasts from the shiny land ship like the Devil himself is at the wheel!! The door swings open, the elevated volume of hate spewing from the factory door speakers acting as entrance music to the pilot who has come from a galaxy far, far away…. His hair is all business on top but the back flows like the mane of a galloping wild stallion. With jeans so tight that even Robert Plant shakes his head. The wife beater he sports, full of stains from the OV Beer that he drinks…at least that’s what you assume as 2 cans rolled from the van door when he first opened it. As he struts past you and your posse with Converse high tops untied and tongues hanging out over his jean cuffs like a panting dog, he winks and shoots the finger gun. Followed shortly by a “Hey”.

You and your boys are stunned….mouths open, not a sound is made by any of you…. The pilot enters the store….you and your friends scatter off on your bikes like they have explosives tied to them, all in order to take a better look at this; this masterpiece; this fantasy star cruiser made by General Motors. The top right of the van sports a small dark globe of glass. A matching sphere parallels the other side.

But it’s her that has your attention…. the woman meant to spend her life within your soul forever… She is an airbrushed beauty of pain splitting proportions. Even the vicious and snarling polar bear that she sits atop won’t move you from your spot, in this pop splattered parking lot. She has tamed this wild beast and made it her chariot!! The picture shows this perfect woman propelling forward at a speed barely captured along the side of this steel sculpture, which is still idling between the fading park lines of this ship temporary docking station.

She is in armour, but not like the knights of the Middle Ages… more like futuristic porno armour!! Her ample breast spilling out of her titanium chest plate and her waist wrapped in a leather shirt with brass nail heads surrounding the fringe… upon her head she wears a steel crown as if hand delivered from the Gods themselves!!! She is looking right at you, seductive, but cold. She holds a magnificent gleaming Trident above her head, clearly prepared to dismantle any army that dare get in her way. She is the vision of perfection. She is the reason for the next week of your life, you are forced to hold your school binder over the straining front of your “mom bought” Sears denim, as you shuffle from class to class. She is the reason you go through a box of Kleenex in 4 days…and she is the reason you buy a guitar, some drums and a mic! If this airbrushed beauty really exists…it is only through the pure fury of rock, that you will catch the attention of this princess from hell. Only then, will she allow you to commence the mating ritual fuelled by the hypnotic sounds of Rock and Roll!!

The pilot emerges back out the store doors… the chiming of the entrance bells snap you and your crew back to reality. As he enters his vessel, ready to head back to Planet “Fuck Ya”…he flashes the sign… his index and pinkie in perfect unison as the rest of his hand clenches into a white knuckle fist… his parting words echo every time from that day forward, you pick up your tool of rock…. “Horn’s Up”!

That…my friends is what Diesel May is made of!!!

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